


I Caused You Such Pain / Now I Want to Explain

by the_afterlight



Series: Spierfeld Week 2018 [3]
Category: Love Simon (2018)
Genre: Forgiveness, Friendship, Gen, Missing Scene, Reconciliation, Spierfeld Week, Use Your Words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 01:16:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14321346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_afterlight/pseuds/the_afterlight
Summary: "Do you think..." Abby said, glancing over her shoulder. Simon looked away hurriedly, but he'd clearly been watching them, and Abby's heart broke just a little. "Do you think we were too harsh with him?"---Missing scenes, between Cabaret and the carnival. Simon and his friends reconcile.





	I Caused You Such Pain / Now I Want to Explain

**Author's Note:**

> Day Three Catch-Up for the 2018 Spierfeld Week, for the theme Canon-Filler!
> 
> This will... possibly be a little controversial in the fandom, because I know a lot of people think that Simon's friends shouldn't have abandoned him after he got outed, and that they owe him all of the apologies. I, uh, disagree, and I say that as someone who has been in Simon's position. (More with the lying, less with the manipulation, pretty much for the same varieties of fears.) This fic reflects that opinion, and hopefully finds an appropriate middle ground between "Simon's friends grovel for forgiveness" and "Simon prostrates himself before his friends."
> 
> It's super short, but I think it wants to be.

"Do you think..." Abby said, glancing over her shoulder. Simon looked away hurriedly, but he'd clearly been watching them, and Abby's heart broke just a little. "Do you think we were too harsh with him?"

Leah shook her head. "No, he was... God, I don't even know. I want to say yes, but the stuff he pulled, it was... Like, he didn't have to come out, but he couldn't have just told _us_?"

Abby worried at her lip, resisting the urge to look over a Simon again. Nick bumped her shoulder with his, and brandished the bouquet at her. "It's been kinda rough, watching him go through this alone," he said. "I kinda thought that someone else would step up, y'know? Ethan, or some of the theater kids."

Taking the bouquet, Abby buried her face in it, breathing the scent in deeply. "He trusted me. Like, I know I was the 'easy' one to come out to, but he still trusted me. I guess what I'm asking is, like, are we really going to _keep_ punishing him for this?"

"I'm not," Leah said, plainly, although there was an emotion in it that Abby couldn't quite recognise. "I mean, it sucked, but I kinda get it, too, y'know? That fear. I'm not saying that I think it's okay, but... I guess I accept his apology. We've kinda already talked a little bit." Abby and Nick both nodded, and Leah added, "Did you guys see his post?"

"About the carnival?" Nick asked. "Yeah, I thought, like, I thought it was pretty cool, actually."

"I was thinking maybe we could go with him."

Abby's mouth widened into a bright, flashing grin, and she nodded. "Yeah! Yeah, that's..." She looked over at Simon again, still smiling. "I think that'd be cool."

* * *

The smiles lasted all the way out to the car, but by the time they'd pulled out of the parking lot, the atmosphere in Simon's Subaru was already growing tense. "So..." Simon said, hands tapping anxiously against the steering wheel as he waited for the light to turn. He glanced over at Leah, in the passenger seat, and Nick and Abby were sitting cuddled up in his rearview mirror. "So is this an apology?"

There was a long moment of quiet, and Simon almost reached for the radio, almost spoke up to say, "Forget it," but Abby's voice cut through the silence. "Do we owe you one?" she asked, softly, but there was an edge to it. Simon swallowed, almost missing the light turning green. He pulled through the intersection before replying.

"No," he said, "you don't. I can't imagine how much I hurt you guys."

"We hurt you, too," Leah pointed out. "We weren't there when you needed us."

Simon shook his head. "I didn't, though." He flicked on his indicator and took the turn off towards the Drarry Downs. "I mean, it would've been easier, yeah. Fuck, these last two weeks have been the absolute worst. But I made it through. Don't... Don't do this because you feel obligated, okay? I really, really want you guys back, but only if you want to be here."

He pulled into the parking lot and took the first parking spot he could find. When he shifted out of gear, Leah placed her hand over his on the gearstick. "I want to," she said firmly. Abby reached up between the seats to place her hand over theirs.

"Me, too." Abby nudged Nick, who rolled his eyes, but he was grinning when he leaned over Abby to add his hand to the pile. 

They stayed there for a moment, just letting themselves be together again for the first time since the start of the year. Leah pulled her hand away first and opened her door. "C'mon," she said, "let's go find this mysterious Blue."

**Author's Note:**

> And yes, Drarry Downs is the canonical location of the carnival in the movie, and yes, it is a reference to _that_ Drarry. These people are all the _best_ kind of geeks.


End file.
